WD Daily Chat - Talk about anything You Like

Chuckwagon · Post by **Chuckwagon** » Sat Apr 02, 2011 23:15

Hey Snowchef, I`ve got some more Chuckwagon`s Western Wisdom for you.
There's always a place 'round my campfire fer` a bullshooter`s blanket like you plant yer` bony butt on! In your case, we cleared a wide-spot with a D-8 Caterpillar! But, you should always remember, polishing your pants on saddle leather don't make you a rider - you shouldn`t expect to win if you banter with me! I`m the king of crap... the expert bullshipper on this ranch! Goodness Chef-O, don`t you know that if you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'. And... never forget that a wink's as good as a nod to a blind mule. (I have no idea what that means, but I thought I`d pass it on to you as there must be some intelligence in it somewhere.)
Yes, yes, Chef with the "S" on your cape... my advice to you is: never drive black cattle in the dark and always drink upstream from the herd. And If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, just try orderin' somebody else's dog around!

steelchef · Post by **steelchef** » Sat Apr 02, 2011 23:31

"Wise men speak because they have something to say; Cowboys because they have to say something." Plato!

steelchef · Post by **steelchef** » Sat Apr 02, 2011 23:46

Chuckwagon wrote:Ha!
Just who do you think invented spurs? You, you... Canadian cacti

I've researched the answer to this question and it happens to be عربة الرامي an ancient Arab who wanted his pony to Gideeup

He reportedly tied a couple of scorpions to his ankles. Neither he nor the horse survived. His name, literally translated means "Wagon Thrower," so you win, again it was a relative.

Chuckwagon · Post by **Chuckwagon** » Sun Apr 03, 2011 01:25

Sure mudchef,
I won`t tell anybody about the time you were trapping. In the north pasture! A bull stepped into your trap and started bellowing... remember? He made so much noise that someone turned him into sausage. I told you, and told you... when you`re full of bull, you should keep your trap shut!

ssorllih · Post by **ssorllih** » Sun Apr 03, 2011 04:10

Rusty , how can we be sure that Chuckwagon don't have a busted spoke in one wheel?

ssorllih · Post by **ssorllih** » Sun Apr 03, 2011 05:03

Had two other couples over for supper tonight. Fed them turkey breast wrapped around ground turkey thighs and drums with 25 percent pork fat. Two kilos(four pounds) finished weight

steelchef · Post by **steelchef** » Sun Apr 03, 2011 05:37

Hey Rosco!

First, let me clear up one thing. Steelchef is just my nickname, my full name is 'Stainless steel chef.'

OK! About Chucky's wheels. I'm afraid that it's worse than one spoke. They have all fallen off! However, the stove that he keeps in the back is his inspiration; the source of his wisdom and bullsh!t. We kid each other mercilessly but in all truth, old Dad is a true Pal, I respect and value his friendship.

Regards,

Rustlesschef

ssorllih · Post by **ssorllih** » Sun Apr 03, 2011 13:42

bright and shiny steel chef, I know friendly gibeing when I see it and have no doubt that you two have been poking feather dusters at each other since you met. I was at the butcher shop the other day and bought some sausage when I cooked it I found that both ends were all cereal filler.
I went back to the man and demanded to know why!
Well he gently told me that with the economy the way it is today it is getting much harder to make ends meat.

steelchef · Post by **steelchef** » Sun Apr 03, 2011 19:31

ssorllih wrote:bright and shiny steel chef

I like that Ross;
Bright, Shiny, now I can legally add BS to my name "steelchef (bs)"

Here's one to get even for "harder to make ends meat."

Q: What's the cheapest kind of meat?
A: Deer testicles. They are under a buck.

Maz · Post by **Maz** » Mon Apr 04, 2011 18:26

And I love the handle you chose on the "other site". I won't divulge it here, respecting your animomunuuitomunousity

Oh no you don't, you seem to forget the identity crises I had. Tell you what I was sitting infront of my PC. after reading some of the posts I pulled the top of my pants away and had a little peek just to make sure. For a moment I was wondering if the red wine had really gotten the better of me.

Chuckwagon · Post by **Chuckwagon** » Mon Apr 04, 2011 22:59

Too Funny Maz,

Hey, the calendars are in!
Watch your mail. Oh, first...
Will you PM your address to me?

Nachos Garcias Ameeger!
Best Wishes,
Chuckwagon

Chuckwagon · Post by **Chuckwagon** » Mon Apr 04, 2011 23:10

Shucks, I liked the part where he said:

...when I cooked it I found that both ends were all cereal filler.
...with the economy the way it is today it is getting much harder to make ends meat.

Good one Ross!

steelchef · Post by **steelchef** » Tue Apr 05, 2011 09:20

There seems to be a glitch on the site (or CW is lockin' me out?) Anyway I'll post this here and he can move it if he wants to;

I have questions!
Generally they relate to temperature and humidity. Specifically, what is the best way to monitor internal temperatures.
I have used a digital probe in one sausage or a slab of meat but in a jerky recipe from this site an internal temperature is specified. How does one determine the internal temperature of jerky?
What are practical means of determining the level of humidity in a fridge or smoker? Obviously, humidity meters but how does one control that without fancy/shmancy equipment? How about raising smoker temps in increments?

The Poles among many other Eastern Europeans and folks worldwide made splendid sausage for many years before all of these "rules" came into place.
Could some of this be in aid of promoting state of the art equipment?

Likewise, the USDA requirements for Nitrites in everything but freshly roasted chicken and spinach salad seems a bit over the top. Sure, they need to protect themselves against claims that they failed to protect the public but once again, salt and smoke both contain nitrites which have served pretty well for many generations.
As originally stated, these are questions, not opinions and I would appreciate any answers or discussion that the forum may have.
Steelchef (bs)

ssorllih · Post by **ssorllih** » Tue Apr 05, 2011 13:07

In a frost free refrigerator the humidity will always be very low because the water vaper will condense on the cold coils. Dew point sub zero. For monitoring the themperature inside jery I would similate the size of the jerky with a piece of copper tube filled with liquid with the temperature probe in that. When smoke houses were fired with chunks of wood you could feed chunks as they were consumed and keep a steady temperature or you could add wood a little faster than it was consumed and raise the temperature. Inexact but it worked. just because in can be measured and controlled makes it easier for the less experienced to get it right.

Chuckwagon · Post by **Chuckwagon** » Tue Apr 05, 2011 22:41

Steelchef wrote:

I have questions!
Generally they relate to temperature and humidity. Specifically, what is the best way to monitor internal temperatures. I have used a digital probe in one sausage or a slab of meat but in a jerky recipe from this site an internal temperature is specified. How does one determine the internal temperature of jerky? What are practical means of determining the level of humidity in a fridge or smoker? Obviously, humidity meters but how does one control that without fancy/shmancy equipment? How about raising smoker temps in increments?

Ok Bright n`shiny Stainless Steel Chef,
There is no practical way for the home hobbyist to monitor internal temperatures of jerky. The new "cooking with moisture" rules by the USDA require specialized equipment. Now you realize the dilemma the small jerky producers are up against with the new "cooking" rules set down by the FSIS. Small shops have understandable difficulty in upgrading to thousands of dollars worth of "fancy/shmancy" humidity integrated cooking equipment.

Best Wishes,
Chuckwagon